Your first step, the first word you speak, the first time you fall head and feet deep in love, heartbreak, the moment when you realise you have finally found your soulmate…as much as these events are defining, there are some things that are less spoken of and only experienced.
Like when you lose a beloved mother and suddenly feel adrift because you realise that you will only ever truly have just the one mother…. And she is gone forever.
You have a long way ahead and no more loving shadow over your head. There will be many surrogate mothers along the way, but they won’t have her quirks, which you also share. You are just discovering them, but it’s been engrained in you all along. And now that you want to share the experience with her, tell her you are just the same as her, with all her eccentricities, you just can’t. And it’s a hard burden to live with.